When I lost consciousness, I immediately found myself on a row boat with 2 oars. I was alone. I saw two islands on the horizon. The current of the water was moving me rapidly (without the need for me to paddle) toward an indescribable island, which was the one on the right. It’s beauty is not something that I can easily put into words. It was luminous, luscious, and I felt an unstoppable magnetic pull to go there. The sand was glowing white, and the water was crystal clear. The trees were huge and sparkling. I saw many people walking on the seashore in white robes. Some were walking alone, some with a companion, some in groups, some with animals. They didn’t pay me any attention. They seemed as if they were just carrying on with their day. Although this island was rather far off, I could see every detail very vividly, even though I on earth I have terrible eyesight. I felt just love and joy in this place. I wanted to go there more than I had ever wanted anything before, and I was elated and excited that I was heading there. The idea that I had died or the world that I was leaving had never occurred to me.
As I was traveling on this boat with great speed toward the ‘heavenly’ island, I looked on my left and took a passing look at the other island. It disgusted me to look at it. The water was dark and thick…..murky, like a swamp. There was no sand, just mud. Everything was dark mud. I could also see everything on this island very clearly even though I was far away. The trees looked deformed and threatening and had no leaves. The people were deformed, limping, dirty, moaning in pain. I was repulsed at this vision, until I saw my daughter, who was then 5 years old, sitting by herself playing on the ‘beach’. This is when I realized that I was not looking at hell, which was my first assumption, but that I was looking at earth. It was then that I realized that I had my oars, and that I had the choice to go back to earth to be her mother again. I realized that she was the only reason that I needed to be on earth. I realized that I could choose to go to heaven though. It was all my choice. If I did not row, I would naturally be taken to heaven. It did not take me any time at all to grab my oars and start rowing with all my might to my daughter. I was heartbroken that I was unable to go to heaven, but I also knew that I would just be going there LATER, when my work on earth was done.
I was angry at my daughter for existing. I kept thinking things like, ‘because of YOU I have to come back to this horrible place!!!’ I had to fight the currents of the water very, very hard to move the boat toward earth. It almost seemed like the harder I tried to fight the current, the harder the current fought me. I started to scream in an effort to make myself stronger. (You know how when you need to push or pick up something really heavy, you make this grunting or groaning sound. It was like that, except I was screaming.) I am sure that I rowed that boat with more strength than I have in my earthly life, but I finally beat the current, and rowed all the way to earth. I screamed the entire way, and the moment I felt my boat hit the shore, I woke up on earth.
I would like to point out that as far as the 5 senses go, the sense of sight was by far the predominant one. I heard nothing but silence UNTIL I started screaming. I never heard the sound of water, even though I was in a boat moving down a river. I had no sense of smell or taste.