I remember nothing until just before it happened. I opened my eyes and just in front of me and above, I saw little lights moving from left to right like they were following each other. I remember being curious about them, but watching them made me even sleepier than ever. I closed my eyes again, but then looked up higher because I heard a voice. I saw the underneath part of a chin, a babushka (scarf) tied there. It was white with big black dots on it. I thought ‘Mom’ was holding me, is all I can tell you. I closed my eyes again then tried to watch those moving lights again. My entire body felt spent, weak, drained. I could not fight it anymore and closed my eyes.
I felt a very quick ‘whoosh!’ and suddenly I was floating at the top of the car ceiling in the backseat behind my Dad’s head!! I saw his silhouette shape, his back to me. I saw the very bright dashboard lights. I saw over in the passenger seat, ‘Mom’ with that scarf on her head. It was night. I realized I was floating and I looked down at my ‘floating’ self, but there was NO BODY there. I could ‘FEEL’ everything around me: FEEL IT!! From my Dad was tremendous fear that he was fighting, so he could drive. From ‘Mom’ I felt some fear but her focus was on Dad and not wanting HIM to be upset.
Then I saw THROUGH the seats of the car. It was an early 50s model car, the seats split, yes, but no room to see between them. Split, so people could push them forward to let kids in the back seat. But I saw right through them; saw a bundle on my ‘Mom’s’ lap. It was me, but I did not know it at the time. My head was toward the driver, my feet pointing at the passenger door. I heard my ‘Mom’ say something in a very anxious fearful voice. I saw her looking down at the bundle in her lap. Dad turned the wheel to the right and I saw him lean over to the bundle.
That’s when I felt another ‘whoosh’ sensation. Everything went black in that instant, and in the same instant I felt HEAVY, weak, tired, drained again. I opened my eyes and saw my Dad’s upside down face staring into mine. Then I remember nothing more of this. I carried this, for lack of a better word, VIDEO, in me and eventually dismissed it, not knowing what it was.
In the late 1970s, as a young adult, I was visiting my oldest sister (9 years older than I) at her house one day. As usual, we talked of all kinds of things. She asked me if she ever told me about how I ‘almost’ died when I was a baby. Surprised, I said ‘NO! Tell me!’ Here is what she told me:
Mom had gotten the FLU and was in bed recovering from it. She had given it to me and I was very, very ill. My Dad came home from work and went in to check on me. I was listless, big dark circles under my eyes, eyes sunken, feverish, not eating, not crying. He immediately told her (my sister) to get me dressed. He needed her to hold me while he drove me to the hospital. THAT is when I interrupted her and told her WHAT she was wearing, the babushka on her head, and the design. She dismissed what I said and continued to tell me that while she was holding me on the way to the hospital, I was barely breathing. I closed my eyes and she felt me get heavier. She suddenly felt I had died and said to Dad, ‘Dad!! I think she’s GONE!!’ Dad pulled the car over and leaned over to check me, he was so scared. That’s when I opened my eyes and Dad let out a huge sigh of relief. He got me to the hospital and the doctors told him that it was nothing short of a miracle that I was still alive.
This was only the FIRST TIME I had a NDE!!! There is so much I need to tell SOME ONE who will believe me. My entire life I have had profound experiences, but who do I tell?? There are truly only two reasons why I could remember anything at that age. 1.) I was supposed to remember it, meaning I believe God had a definite purpose for it. It would play an extremely important part in how I would grow up to be. He already knew I would have to get through my childhood, which was not going to be easy. So much was going to happen and I would need to be strong. He was going to show me things, which I may not understand at first or even for quite a while! Only later in life would it make sense to me. 2.) I believe I did stop breathing and I left my body, which was forever imprinted on me.
Such an occurrence is major! How could a person not store such things, when you actually know what it’s like when you die and the eternal part of you, your soul, is freed? To be weightless and peaceful and so aware of every detail around you! It seems so unreal, but it happened. The frustrating part is that I wanted to tell people, I wanted them to know it as I know it. Because if they do know what death is, they would not be afraid to go when their time comes. Or when a loved one dies and the heartache is too much, they can gain great peace within, knowing that the truest part of them did not die, but lives on, just not in this realm.